| Blogs / Ramblings
1/29/2009 - Trapped In An Elevator
1/27/2009 - The Close Call
1/14/2009 - Tom McCoy
12/23/2008 - Political Science
12/09/2008 - Grinch
10/08/2008 - 30th Birthday
7/25/2008 - Installing Blinds
6/03/2008 - The Great Wall
5/30/2008 - Rudeness
5/22/2008 - Sick Days At Work
4/09/2008 - Home Warrantee
3/31/2008 - Animal Crackers
3/17/2008 - Green Beverage Day
3/05/2008 - I Should Write A Novel
2/26/2008 - The Evil Oak
2/18/2008 - A Tribute To My iPod
2/11/2008 - Criminology Textbooks
2/04/2008 - The Surgery
1/31/2008 - WDW Marathon Part V
1/25/2008 - WDW Marathon Part IV
1/19/2008 - WDW Marathon Part III
1/17/2008 - WDW Marathon Part II
1/16/2008 - WDW Marathon Part I
1/12/2008 - Marathon Details
1/09/2008 - Running From My Run
1/04/2008 - The Holidays
1/01/2008 - First Blog
Green Beverage Day
The non-drinker's guide to consuming green food coloring. . . . For non-drinkers like myself, there is a severe lack of green colored beverages on St. Patrick's Day.
Nonetheless, there are plenty of places that will accommodate your needs
with a minimal amount of badgering.
For example: Today, you should be able to get the following:
Water, Bagels, and... uh... did I already say water?
Okay, so it's painfully difficult to track down a drinking establishment
that will go out of their way for you (water drinkers are apparently not
good tippers).
So what can you do? Unfortunately, it's a little late for this year. However,
with a mere 365 days until the next Green Beverage day, you should be able
to wear down even the staunchest enemies of teetotalers.
The non-drinker's guide to consuming green food coloring.
Bring your own food coloring, and remember to think BIG:
Green milk, cranberry juice, and eggnog are a good start. But with enough
coloring, everything from Diet Pepsi to bacon grease can be green.
Don't limit yourself to drinks. Epic, life-altering poems have been written
about green eggs and ham, but be creative... Anyone can serve green salads,
but what about matching green cheese, green croutons, and green dressing?
Green french fries with green mustard are nice, but try some green mashed
potatoes with green gravy and a lump of green butter. Start your annoying
neighbor's dog on an all-green diet now, and enjoy a naturally colored dog
noodle soup by this time next year!
You shouldn't be afraid to expand your greeness outside of food:
Car enthusiasts might try green gasoline, hygiene enthusiasts might consider
green bubble baths, and who in their right mind wouldn't want a little color
in their urn after being cremated?
The point is that non-drinkers can have fun too. Follow these steps, and
your skin will be a healthy shade of green in no time!
Jeff's moral for the day: "Green" is a funny word. Try to use it at
least 22 times in every blog you write.
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